my DIY baby

I’m dividing my time between the OB That’s Not Keen on Home Birth and the Midwife That Is (of course). Had a session at home with the midwife right after returning from a parental visit, discussed nutrition, including my Sudden Disdain For Protein and my Heightened Enthusiasm For Dairy. I’m also mildly stunned that I’m still turning up my nose against winter squash, which I was sure I’d never get enough of when I discovered it at the farmer’s market this fall. I’m now counting diligently and daily how much of each food group I’m getting, which feels like an eating disorder of some kind. I’ve never thought about food so much or so constantly, but the nausea seems to require ongoing intake of something.

That was it for the midwife for another month, so then I went to see the OB. It’s feeling redundant, actually, they use the same tools and ask similar questions at this point. But the OB gets a gold star for finding the baby’s heartbeat this time. It feels like they’re tapping into my inner Darth Vader with the probe on my belly: whooosh whooosh thud… thud… whooosh thud (that’s your heartbeat, they clarify needlessly) and then this sudden whup!whup!whup!whup!whup!whup!whup!whup!whup!whup! – there it is! She guesses it’s about 160 – 170 beats a minute, she’s that good. I’m impressed. And though it’s a small thing and I’m not overly sentimental, I find myself thinking of how sturdy it sounded.

Next I get to decide if I’m doing the blood screening to find out if it’s defective. It doesn’t sound defective to me. But maybe more information is a good thing. I don’t know. If I do it, it won’t be because there’s anything wrong with this kid.

Around the edges I’m reading a ton, as usual. The Philosophical Baby, The Mayo Clinic Guide to Pregnancy, Active Birth, anything by Ina May Gaskin, and Journey Into Motherhood are my tops lately.

And then there’s this. An astonishing find, it was my grandmother’s in 1947 and earnestly promises to help by answering the questions we women have that doctors just don’t have time to answer because so very many babies are being born right this instant. The nutritional advice is actually quite sound and familiar, and while the actions of hormones are considered mysterious (hormones aren’t mentioned once, so I’m guessing they weren’t discovered yet), they have a pretty good sense of how gestation goes. So that hasn’t changed. Here’s a novel bit: it also suggests I should cut down smoking to one pack a day, but that if quitting entirely would make me a shrew, then that’s not recommended. Oh here, I won’t paraphrase… “If you have been used to smoking considerably more than [moderately - say 10 cigarettes a day], by no means try to give them up in pregnancy. There is no surer way of upsetting the nerves at a period when you should be calm and happy, or of converting a placid, sweet-tempered girl into an intolerable shrew.“

Just goes to show you, take all advice with a grain of salt… or a cigarette, by golly, if it keeps you sweet.